Untold Arsenal » 2009 » March

Insanity Week: Secret letter to Arsenal revealed

As the news just gets worse and worse (Diaby is now out) a letter sent by an national association to Arsenal with each player who is used by the country has been leaked to Untold Arsenal.  We print it below:

Dear Sir / Madam,  

Thank you for providing [player name] for our use during […]

Insanity week: injury to Arsenal players updates

Thanks to everyone for the updates – I really do appreciate every email.  In case you missed any… It seems Vela didn’t play because he was suspended (silly me, didn’t know that).

Van Persie has left the Dutch squad because of a hamstring injury.  That could be a bit of a bugger, because those things last several […]

Insanity Week: Arsenal injuries so far; News of World censors Untold Arsenal

It turns out to be quite difficult to get information on the inevitable damage done to Arsenal players by the insanity of the international week, in which players who we pay turn out for countries which they may or may not have been born in, to play games of no particular interest to many people […]

News of the World runs Untold Arsenal “Cesc leaving” story today

It started as a little joke – but got more comments than most posts on this site: a list earlier this week predicting that everyone would leave the club this summer.  Exactly the sort of rubbish the charlatans who write newspaper football columns write.
And would you believe it, the News of the World jumped straight […]

Welcome to Insanity Day

It is the day when we take all our best players and give them to nutters who don’t care about their long term well-being and will sacrifice our players’ careers just to keep their own job.
It is the day that Capello has decided to have a spat with Appy Arry Headcase over Ron Knee (remember […]

Coming to Arsenal next season

One of the great things about Arsenal is that every year we have a whole stream of players who graduate through the ranks.  We have the fringe first teamers who step up to be properly part of the main squad, while others come through and move into the Diddly Cup team.
This step up process this […]

Entire Arsenal first team will leave this summer

As you’ll know if you read the wonderful honest excellently truthful British sporting pages, every year every single player from Arsenal is about to leave and play somewhere else.
In fact, what actually happens is that the Lord Wenger manipulates the market in order to move on players that he thinks have come to the end […]

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Manchester Bankrupt debts up for sale.

While Arsenal continue to sell replica shirts, companies and banks that have stupidly financed Manchester Bankrupt’s dive into bankruptcy are now selling off the club’s debts.   At a discount. So if you thought that this season’s away shirt is a good deal at 50% off, how about some Manchester debts at 70% off the list price?

You […]

Cursed Hull start the downward spiral

Having been granted the Curse of Arsenal, in honour of their activities in the FA Cup, Hull Spitty began their descent into the depths with a defeat to Wigan.  Now they are starting to watch a greater unwind as they struggle to control the results of their wild and crazed allegations against Cesc Fábregas.
The “Horton” […]