Thursday, October 13th, 2011 « Untold Arsenal: Arsenal News. Supporting the Lord Wenger; coach of the decade

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Blame 101 – Don’t let your ignorance interfere with your prejudice

by Don McMahon

This is a brief course for anyone who would like to join the Anti-Arsenal Arsenal but hasn’t quite got the hang of it yet.  It is a quick course in how to play the blame game at the Arsenal.

Rule number 1 – blaming is better than being open-minded, optimistic or pragmatic as it effectively transfers the guilt and responsibility for your Arsenal frustrations onto the shoulders of others, who may or may not actually be culpable, but that isn’t important….as long as you feel better.

A perfect example of this is seen in the blog-sphere where statements like this reverberate on a daily basis; ¨There can be nil debate over who is ultimately responsible for playing issues-The Manager.¨ Such certitude and arrogance in one sentence! Why can’t there be any debate about who is responsible?  Why is it only the manager? How did it become his sole responsibility, if true?

Rule number 2 – State unproven and unsupported hypotheses as if they were proven facts and make sure that these unrelated generalizations become integrated ¨proofs¨of your blame game directed against your target(s), circular logic for sure. Here is an example from the same article; ¨Equally, he will not buy a player as aged over 30 years¨ but the truth is that AW has brought in players in that age bracket on any number of occasions.  When Pires reached 30, for example, he was offered another 2 year contract by the Club but he was pissed off at his CL Final treatment and turned it down.

Rule number 3 – When Making outrageous accusations against your target based on rumours, media stories, fans wishful thinking, never investigate if there is any foundation to these innuendos but, instead ensure that your arguments are carried to absurd heights and that almost everything that can be attributed to misunderstanding, misfortune, and misinformation will be laid at his feet. Here is a classic example , from the same article; ¨The semi egalitarian wage structure with a ceiling set at some £90,000 (?) per week with hardly any exceptions¨……despite the fact that no one outside a tight circle of AFC management know our real wage structure , this writer maintains that our wage ceiling is £90,000 per week. How did he come by that figure? He made it up based on countless media and fan speculations or in a brain-fart moment.

Rule number 4 – When making your vitriolic claims, make sure you use the revisionist approach to history by reinterpreting events in your crystal clear hindsight. Here is another example of that skill in action; ¨Is this why we left it till the last 36 hours and 2 weeks into the new season before buying 4 more experienced players ?¨  Of course it had to be our incompetent and delusional manager who was at fault for waiting so long and late. Yet every player who came in at the end was involved in negotiations weeks before they actually joined. The players and their agents confirmed this, but who cares about the truth when you’ve got an axe to grind, right?

Rule number 5 – highlight a purported temporary failing as if it were a permanent disaster, both unchangeable and unsolvable, while pointing the figure for this terrible disaster at your target. Here is another example of this spurious strategy; ¨ The obvious failure to blend youth with experience ?¨  Is there a failure? Is it one of not blending youth with experience? Is it obvious?

Rule number 6 – Throw out a statement brimming with hyperbole which is dubious at best and often totally fictitious but which is posited as a rhetorical question, such as the following; ¨ Whatever else, the last few months have exploded the club’s plans and policies and goodness only knows what will happen now. ¨  All is lost according to the author and nobody knows what can be done and what terrifying consequences will present themselves as the sky falls in, but one thing for sure, it is the hated manager’s, player’s fault!

Rule number 7 – Ask the cretins and morons who troll the club’s websites and seek someone to blame to please suggest dramatic and lifesaving solutions to these issues, since the current management cannot or will not act! Here is where some really funny and inventive ideas are excreted, often couched in very poor English:

a) One post suggests that we should get rid of half the team,including players who have not yet played with us but who are captains of their respective nations and scoring at will in International games.

b) The same idiot cries for the urgent purchase of just about every player who has ever been linked with the Club, regardless of the wages, inflated asking price or financial impact. This despite just having said we have to lower our wage bill by getting rid of the ¨mediocre¨players.

c) Numerous fools quickly jump on the blame train and scream their outrage at the target(s) over the net, broadcasting their disdain and vigorous but mindless distrust of said person(s) in terms that would make a sailor blush.

d) Another retard suggested we should sign a pre-sale deal with City for RVP since he clearly intends to leave in January  and has sold his house in order to move to Manchester. The only problems with this brilliant insight is that he has bought a new house closer to Highbury and he has stated that he will resign when he is less focused on playing Arsenal Football.

I sincerely hope this brief course on how to villanize and inculpate Arsenal’s current leadership, without worrying about the truth, has stimulated those readers who need to find scapegoats and ¨punish¨ them irrespective of such annoying distractions as broad-mindedness, realism, justice or veracity. Meanwhile the majority of faithful Gooners will avoid the blame game and instead watch beautiful football.

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