Lenny Henry, Shakespeare, Mourinho, Van Persie, Crisis and invented Spuds goals « Untold Arsenal: Arsenal News, supporting the club, the players and the manager

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By Tony Attwood

I went to see Lenny Henry in “Comedy of Errors” last night at the National Theatre (which explains the first two elements of my headline), and it was stunning, brilliant and extraordinary – and had a fair old Arsenal element in it too.

The tragedy of Shakespeare is that it is taught very badly in many UK schools, so the vast majority of the British public think it is dull, incomprehensible and tedious.  If only they went to see this show – it is a knock about slap stick that (were the audience to have a somewhat lower average age) would have them rolling in the aisles.  I had tears rolling down my face.

Shakespeare left us virtually no stage directions, and absolutely no costume instructions, so the Arsenal connection is just one of the many modernisations although the script of course is the one that God handed down sometime around 1597.   It comes with the Dromio twins who wear AFC shirts throughout – in the early stage of the story JVC shirts (oh, memories) and then for most of the show when they are older, Emirates shirts.  A neat touch – and the shirts are well in keeping with the personality that the twins have in the production.

Anyway, the people in row G behind me took up the Arsenal theme at half time discussing the use of the shirts, and the return of Henry (Thierry not Lenny) and then ultimately the Glorious Victory, as it is now called.  (Incidentally, where’s the Tottenham Hotspur DVD of the game on Sunday – they usually have one out by now.  They got the special DVD of the 4-4 draw out within minutes of the final whistle I recall).

As “Bonkers” by Dizzee Rascal was played and the neon lights of the brothel flashed to announce the start of the second half in the Olivier Theatre one of these good folk in the inferior row G (I was in F – a much better placed view of course) ended by saying that the result against the “Spurs” would “take the pressure off Wenger”.

And I thought – what pressure?

I let the thought pass until at 11pm, driving back to my Midlands hide-away I heard on the Radio 5 that the big news of the day was that Mourinho had been spotted in London and was looking for a house.  “With three of London’s teams in crisis” started the commentator, and then meandered on – but he never actually told us who these three teams are.

I pondered.  Who could it be?

QPR clearly are having a rotten time so they are, I guess, one.  Chelsea, having spent their billions on a youth system that clearly doesn’t produce much youth (apart from J Terry, now of advancing years and dubious morality) is clearly another.  For that amount of money the owner might have expected more than a challenge for a Champs League spot.

Tottenham obviously are one.  Their dyscalculic manager might well jump ship, the club could well be sold by Enic this summer, and there’s still all the legal what-not concerning the files surrounding the Olympic stadium that have turned up in the wrong place.  Also, we still don’t know how they are accounting for the aborted attempt to get that stadium.  And if Boris loses the Mayoral elections in London then Ken could get back in and stop the use of public money to support to the Tottenham stadium regeneration plan.  (Vote Ken, Londoners!).  And they let in five at the weekend against an Arsenal team supposedly having their worst season since 1924.

On the way back I drove through Barnet, and they had all their stadium lights still on – and I realised they could be one of the crisis clubs too since they have to move grounds next season.

So yes, there are crisis clubs in London – but can you see Mourinho going to Barnet?  Bit of a story if he did!  But then QPR?  Or Tottenham?  Or Chelsea?  (Certainly not Charlton as they are 10,000 points clear at the top of the 3rd division).

Anyway all this gallivanting around in London and driving home into the small hours meant that I missed much of the big news – apparently Robin has a groin strain and Arsenal are begging the Netherlands not to play him tonight.   The Guardian has this story today announcing that Robin has “scored 33 goals in all competitions in what has so far been his first injury-free campaign since joining Arsenal in 2004.   Following Arsenal’s 5-3 victory over Tottenham Hotspur at the Emirates on Sunday in the north London derby….”

And there I lost it a bit because I must have fallen asleep in the weekend game.  I mean, I remember the early two goals by the Tinies, but the third.  When was that?  Does Tottenham now count goals scored in the kick about before the game starts?

So is Arsenal a club in crisis?   For me, no.  In a world of financial doping, the impossible transfer market, the media-and-blog anti-Arsenal inventions, and match fixing the fact that Arsenal is still near the top is a total miracle.

Consider and compare us with another club who recently had visions of a top four break-through.  Remember Aston Villa under Martin O’Neill OBE who were playing in Europe, and were about to take one of the top four spots for a long period of dominance.   They are 15th, and lost £54m in 2010/11.  Every year Randy Lerner pumps more in, and gets… nothing.  The ground is around 70% full much of the time and they like Chelsea are finding that money doesn’t make success.

Indeed if the tragedy of Shakespeare is that it is taught so badly in schools that most people think it is boring, the tragedy of football is that supporters have been hoodwinked to believe that football is just about money.   You can pour in as much as you like, but on its own it does not buy success.

Mourinho to Barnet.  I quite like that.

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